so....it's spring

Lovely sunshine is coming through the blinds. My windows are open, and the breeze is oh-so-sweet. Blossoms are falling off the tree right outside, reminding me of a scene from Narnia. It's one of those days where any sort of new, exciting thing could happen.

I have new Converse on my feet, that I've been saving for since last year. Relient K is stuck in my head {what could be better?}, and I'm anticipating a call later on today from my soul sister. After studying some chemistry, that is. Yay for Lewis structures and balanced equations! she said in a semi-sarcastic tone.

The Hunger Games is finally in theatres, and I'm crazy excited to see it with my Crew. I spent most of last night listening to Lecrae on YouTube, and am blown away by how powerful his songs are. He makes me want to go out in the world and scream, "I love Jesus!" to anyone who will listen.

 I'm back playing soccer at the private school, and am so thankful for the friends I've made there. It's funny how much happier you are when you have sisters in Christ around you. I've been writing in my journal a lot lately, which would explain for the lack of posts on here. Hopefully, I'll get back in my groove soon.

God is so good. And that's the most wonderful thing about this spring day.

"You touch my heavy heart, and when You do You make it light."

love always,

~Lily

I think this is what most call a 'testimony'

I grew up in what we Presbyterian's call a 'Covenant Home,' which is just a fancy way of saying I was brought up as a Christian. My parents are both strong Christians, I was homeschooled, my church was a big part of my life, etc. To me, God had always been there, and I couldn't imagine other people not knowing about Him.

Because I had a 'Covenant' childhood, I never had a moment where I truly gave my heart to Jesus. I guess it was just kind of expected that I already had, since my parents were Christians and I'd always gone to church. I do vaguely remember a night when I was seven, and I got out of bed, knelt, and told Jesus that if He came into my life, I would promise to be a good sister and daughter {oh, I was so cute back then}. But even that wasn't an actual giving up my life to Him.

Time went on. Two years ago I attended WorldViews Academy for the first time, and met other girls struggling with the same issues I was. I started blogging, and realized I wasn't alone in my trust issues with God. I made dear friends in Christ, who uplifted me and showed me how much He loves me. 

And somewhere between all of this, I found Him. Sure, I'd had Him before, but not like this. This was God showing me how deep His love is for me by being my Best Friend. Me, a sinful teenager, had a best friend in Jesus! It was almost too amazing to believe. 

But believe I did, and from 2010-on God made it even clearer how treasured I was to Him. When Mom-mom died, I turned to Him for comfort. When my soccer team fell apart, He became my Best Friend. When I thought I had no close friends on earth, He reminded me of Emily and brought me poncho pals and soul sisters. Whenever I felt hopeless and beaten down, He raised me up with a lyric and a loving touch.

This is the face of a girl who knows how much her Savior loves her. The face of a girl who can now say, with confidence, "I have a friend in Jesus." The face of a girl who knows Christianity isn't about rules or  modesty or boredom or guidelines----it's about a relationship with Him who died on a cross for her. And that is the most wonderful relationship in the world.

so, heart....can you just be quiet? I'm trying to guard you here!

 I think this quote represents me nicely.Yes, I've bared my soul on this blog before, but there are so many things I haven't told you. Personal happenings, future dreams, even certain doubts and fears. It might be hard for you to tell, but I'm actually a very private person. I keep most observations and thoughts to myself, and ponder them when I am alone. If something is troubling me, I'll wait until nighttime and write about it in my journal.

If a friend pushes me far enough, then I will tell her/him some of what I'm feeling. But for the most part, my heart is a secret garden, with very high walls.

I suppose that's a good thing. Proverbs 4:23 says, Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.

And that really is everything! If people could look {and I mean look} at each other's hearts, we probably wouldn't have many friends. I mean, can you honestly say that you've never had a bad thought about someone you care about? yeah, I didn't think so.

God gave us this command for a reason. He knows how ugly our hearts can be, and He didn't want us to hurt ourselves and others by having us blab every little twinge our heart has. 

"But Lily," you might say, "guarding your heart is so cliche! Every purity book tells me to do it, but I have to tell so and so how I feel, otherwise I might lose him forever!"

If you said that, this would be my reply: Guard your heart. Now isn't the time to tell that certain someone how you feel. And if you're afraid that he'll disappear if you keep your feelings to yourself, then you aren't trusting God enough. Seriously......if he's meant to be Your Guy, then the Author of all love stories will make it happen.

Your heart is a special thing! Keep it secret, keep it safe. (:

*just keep guarding, just keep praying*

it's moments like these that count

Awkward: 
finding a song you love, going to check out the rest of the band's music---and finding a curse word *sighs*
feeling like a pig 'cause you're the only one who took two cookies
wanting to wear makeup, but not wanting to actually put it on
wishing summer were here when it's only March
completely forgetting it's a new month and not changing your calendar
being caught up with Doctor Who and having to wait until next fall for new episodes
realizing what a sucker you are for sad movies
your Pandora ♥


Awesome:
Christmas lights strung up in your room
lotion that smells like an exotic place
soft and cozy blankets
getting your friends and brother interested in Doctor Who 
seeing special people at Chick-fil-a
talking with a dear friend for only ten minutes, but it making your entire day
getting a hug from the little boy you babysit
your Pandora ♥