to you

but since I'm not, just read away and figure out if I'm talking to you or not. 

Hey big sister. I miss you, even though you're just a shadow from the past. I haven't written to you in ages, but I'm pretty sure you still have a place saved for me up there, right inbetween you and Mom-mom. It's true, I question God's decision to take you so soon---but good gravy, I can't wait to meet you. 

 You're my best friend. I mean, how long have we known each other? Pretty much our entire lives, right? Things have changed for me over the years, but never you. You've always been the smile I needed on sad days, the level head on hyper days, and had a semi-sarcastic laugh every other one. I can't tell you how happy I am now that you and Aiden have started to become awkward friends, for you both mean a lot to me. I honestly can't imagine my life without you. 

oh my soul sister....where would I be without you? Very lost, and I doubt I'd smile every time I hear Stellar Kart lyrics. I used to wonder what it would be like to know someone who was exactly like me---yeah, it feels like this :) I think about our future plans like every single day, and seeing the wicked cool collage you made for me gets me oh-so-psyched for life during/after college. Yeah, I pretty much thank God for you every single day.

you're my confidant; at least, that's what I like to call you in my mind. How many random, fast phone calls have we had in the past year and a half? Even ones after midnight, with my eyes drooping, giggling over ridiculous things only you find funny. Awkward things seem commonplace with you, like I'm talking to a family member. In fact, you are kind of like my older sister, in a funky way ;) Thank you, dear, for introducing me to Owl City, Doctor Who, and countless other amazing things. I love you oh-so-much.

This is kind of a general one---but oh my goodness, I miss you girls. We started out as innocent girls, who just wanted to play soccer. Now where are we? There are so many things I wish I could have changed, said, and done. You're all spread out today, and I've only talked with one or two of you since that last day. I've had constant dreams about you all, that somehow morph in to nightmares. I miss the times and jokes we had, and sometimes I cry, thinking of our mingled pasts. I miss the old us, and the sisters you used to be to me.




You're my best guy friend, aside from that other special dude *wink wink* But really, I would have gone insane long ago if you weren't in my life. You get this hilarious tone in your voice and are just like, "Okay Kat, calm down now---everything will be all right." And, of course, it always is. Thanks for putting up with my randomness, really bad jokes, and sometimes dumbfounded expressions. You're an awesome guy, and I hope we're friends forever.

  
 My first best friend, and one of the only people I can really 'catch up with' and there's no awkwardness! I still find pictures of us in our soccer uniforms and smile, or the one of us washing dishes in your kitchen. Ah, we were so cute!! Please, stay in my life.

I remember seeing you for the first time and thinking, "Wow, she looks really cool!" And you still are. I often wonder why in the world you spent so much time with me, that dorky eleven-year old who just wanted to make music videos. Thank you for never making me feel younger than you *hugs* You're in college, which is weird---Psych marathon during your break?



 
You, my peeps, are so very special to me. It's my last year to be around you guys every week, and I'm going to miss everything about y'all!!! Two minute conversations between classes; crazy laughs in science or composition; super fast hugs; those stairs I'm pretty sure everyone has fallen down at some point. I'll never forget you guys, ever. Cross my heart, hope to die, throw a softball in my eye. 

 Hi. You're the most wonderful boy I've ever known, and I can honestly say I've liked you since that first scary day. I didn't think it was possible---but I fall even harder for you every time I see you. Thanks for being you.